The scattered thoughts of a new mom.
The biggest road block to my blog posting lately is my current obsession with the webcomic Questionable Content. My sister was talking about it the last time she was in town, so I’m reading up on it. They post every weekday and have done so for a few years. There are currently 1,674 comics. I started from the beginning and am on number 930 at the moment. It makes me laugh every once in awhile, and I’ve become interested in the characters, but I feel like I’m reading out of compulsion more than actual interest. It’s like, I’m supposed to finish this story, so I’d better do it! I mostly ignore the elitist music references. It’s a lot of meta-humor, and I don’t have the energy or interest to look up the back-story on any of it. So, something I don’t really care about is ruling my life right now. It’s a little disturbing.
And I don’t know if it’s because of the comic or because of school letting out for summer or because of the major life changes of having a baby and preparing for a wedding, but I’ve been having little “Gah! I’ve lost my freedom!” moments lately. I miss being able to just hang out at a coffee shop with my friends or be impulsive and go on a picnic or hiking or even bowling whenever I feel like it without thinking twice about how it will fit into Layla’s feeding schedule and whether or not she’ll let anyone else hold her during the outing. And it’s not that regret her. I would never trade her for that freedom or anything else. But I feel like my youth and carefree ways deserve a small eulogy. I should write some really crappy poetry for it and burn it in front of the Sonic at 21st and Tyler where we used to hang out in high school. It’s time to grow up and get over it.
In other news, we found out on Tuesday that Layla is in the 2nd percentile for her weight. As in, she’s almost five months old, but only 11 pounds, 5 ounces. I know I shouldn’t be that worried because I was really small like that, but I can’t help panicking a little. We started her on some rice cereal yesterday, so hopefully that’ll help her pack on the ounces a little bit. I just want her to be healthy and keep growing. She’s done a good job of eating the cereal so far. However, she’s also discovering new ways of entertaining herself. This afternoon, she figured out how to grin and squish her cereal back out of her mouth and all over her face. She follows up with a goofy short gasping laugh, a little preview of the dorky girl she’ll be someday. Just like her Mama. :)
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